Finding a Christmas Tree
by Zellcan'twrite
Summary: ...which is proving to be surprisingly challenging this December! Join James, Leonard, and the rest of their brothers on their quest for a Christmas tree. Will they find it before Kevin makes them deaf, or before Leonard goes completely insane? Title comes from 'The Twelve Pains of Christmas'. ASTCE-verse. 12 chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**1**

"Oh, come on! Not here either?!" Leonard shouted. "We've been to three places already!"

It was early December in the small town called Enterprise, and Leonard was beginning to wonder if they were going to have a Christmas tree this year. They'd even left their town and gone to the big city to look, but had failed to find one. Again. It seemed that all the places which in previous years had had trees were sold out or just not open. It was a bit ridiculous, in Leonard's opinion. It wasn't as though it was the week before Christmas; if it were, he'd understand the lack of trees. As it was, however, it hadn't even snowed yet, and the only reasons any Christmas decorations were out was either because people had gotten the jump on decorating, or because of the fact that Christmas was used in marketing entirely too early.

Leonard had thought they were ahead of the game by getting a tree this early. With two younger siblings in high school, one in middle school, and one in college, not to mention the fact that he himself was in medical school. Exams were coming up soon, and once they started, there would be no time to get a tree and decorate it. Spock had in fact complained that he was unable to take the afternoon off (not that he would every use that term; he'd remind them that he was simply claiming that he was stating the illogical nature of taking time off from studying for exams). The combined might of James' cajoling, Kevin's teasing, and Pavel's puppy eyes had managed to shut him up for once, though he had been working through math problems the whole way to the city.

"We have terrible luck, don't we?" James asked hypothetically, tone still his usually even one. Very few things in life caused James angst; Leonard (and their parents) had been very grateful that his teenage years had not been an emotional rollercoaster of tantrums and moodiness.

"Guess so, Jim," Leonard replied morosely, sighing. He didn't quite possess the same sunny disposition as his brother. Admittedly, James was not the one driving everyone around from place to place. That would dampen anyone's mood. As long as Spock kept his mouth shut, he'd probably be able to stay relatively-

"James and Leonard, luck has nothing to do with our circumstances. Luck is an illogical and probably nonexistent quantity," Spock spoke up. Whether the boy was capable of sensing Leonard's bad mood or was simply testy himself, it certainly did the trick.

"Dammit, Spock!" Leonard snapped as the seven boys walked back to the car, treeless again.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> _This is the first time I'll try to publish a relatively Christmas-themed fic, whether it's on this profile or my old one. Wish me luck with publishing-I have twelve chapters to upload between now and the 25th. At least I've got them all written..._

_Anyway, in case you didn't know already, this takes place in the ASTCE (A Small Town Called Enterprise)-verse. It's a sort-of high school AU with the characters from TOS, TNG, and VOY. Since no characters from TNG or VOY appear in this fic, and only the ASTCE equivalents of Jean-Luc and Katie are mentioned, this is being filed under TOS. In the TOS stories, all the main male characters and Kevin Riley (because Riley is hilarious and awesome) are brothers. Leonard is the oldest, followed by Scotty, followed by James and Spock (who are fraternal twins), followed by Hikaru, followed by Kevin, followed by Pavel. Their parents work internationally (one of the reasons Hikaru and Pavel are both adopted), partly because I just don't know which set of parents of the main characters they'd represent, and party because I enjoy the the thought of a twenty-something Leonard McCoy having to deal with six younger siblings. __Nyota Uhura is not related to them because I do not write incest._

_These twelve chapters were originally part of a larger work based on the song 'The Twelve Pains of Christmas'. Alas, I haven't gotten the rest written up yet. Perhaps I'll publish those story arcs another Christmas. Assuming I ever finish them. On the bright side, the parts I _did_ finish make for a complete, if rather sparse, story._

_Enjoy, and please review! The ASTCE-verse has always thrived on suggestions. _


	2. Chapter 2

**2**

"Perhaps we'd better try the Boys and Girls Club," James suggested after yet another place turned out to be closed. "They always have trees. According to Katie, anyway." James' friend made an annual pilgrimage to the Boys and Girls Club of America's tree lot in the nearest, piling everyone into the Delta Flyer and trying to survive the journey with Neelix and Tuvok arguing, Seven making her rather...weird observations, and Tom trying to co-opt the steering wheel. And when Katie's boyfriend was along for the ride...

In other words, it was James and Leonard's family taken up to eleven. In a slightly longer car ride.

"Alright. Let's go there," Leonard agreed. Quite frankly, he was too tired to suggest anything else, not to mention the fact that he had no better ideas. "Do you know where it is?"

James shrugged. Pavel, meanwhile, clambered to the front and entered 'Boys and Girls club' into the GPS system. For a child his age and with his somewhat-limited grasp of English, he handled the GPS system with remarkable ease.

"Holy cow!" Kevin cried when he saw the results. "It's on the other side of the city!"

Leonard groaned. More driving for him. This year, their tree had better be a real wonder.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's note:<strong> _For those of you not aware of the larger ASTCE-verse, Katie is the counterpart of Captain Kathryn Janeway from Voyager. I figured that in canon, Janeway and Kirk would get along pretty well, so James and Katie are friends. The Delta Flyer is their car, nickname courtesy of Tom (Tom Paris, obviously). Originally, it was going to be Voyager, but that was cliche even for me. _

_I don't have last names for any of the families. Please review with suggestions!_


	3. Chapter 3

**3**

"I swear, Kevin, I will choke you if you sing one more rendition of 'Jingle Bells!'" Scotty yelled. He had to yell, or he wouldn't be heard over the younger boy's voice.

The family had been stuck in stop-and-go traffic for half an hour now, and were all getting a bit testy. Except maybe for Spock, who was no different than normal. Then again, he _had_ started declaring that personal vehicles were "illogical" and that "it would be a more rational use of time to just go on foot". Much as he loved to deny it, Spock still did indeed have emotions.

"Okay. I was running out of ways to sing it anyway," Kevin replied. "I'll sing something else, then."

"Kevin-"

"ROCKIN' AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE

AT THE CHRISTMAS PARTY HOP!"

"KEVIN!"

_Liking music is one thing, but this is getting ridiculous,_ Leonard thought to himself. It wouldn't be so bad if Kevin could actually sing. As it was, however, the young one had a ways to go before he reached Broadway. As in, a _long_ way.

Pavel put his hands over his ears. James smiled wanly at him. Both of them knew that this was a futile gesture. Perhaps Kevin had no singing talent, but he _did_ have a very loud voice.

"Both of you are being extremely illogical," Spock had to yell to make himself heard.

"This had better be worth it," Leonard growled to no one in particular. Not that anyone heard him over Kevin's singing.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's note:<strong>_ I noticed that Hikaru is getting neglected thus far in this fic. I'm sorry, Hikaru fans. He'll be in plenty later._

_If Riley had a character tab, I'd add him as the fourth character..._

_I don't have as much to say tonight. I've got a very nerve-wracking exam tomorrow. And will find out whether I got into the college I wanted to._

_Enjoy and please review!_


	4. Chapter 4

**4**

Finally, Leonard's family had made it to the Boys and Girls club…to see it was closed.

After some venting of frustration on Leonard, Scotty, and Hikaru's part, the family piled back into the van.

"Just our luck," commented Leonard sourly. "Now then. Any suggestions?"

"I believe I saw a place which had several Christmas trees on our way to the Club," Spock declared. "It would be logical to try finding a tree there."

"Why didn't you say so in the first place?" Leonard cried, wheeling to face his younger brother.

"We already had a destination. Besides, I would have had to make myself heard over Kevin," Spock replied. Leonard mentally face palmed and gripped the wheel a little tighter as Spock told him the destination of the next place.

"Lord, help me survive this," he murmured.

"OH, CHRISTMAS TREE

OH, CHRISTMAS TREE

HOW LOVELY ARE THY BRANCHES!"

"KEVIN!" Scotty and Leonard shouted.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's note:<strong> _Sorry it took me so long to update. But as far as I can tell, not a lot of people have been reading this, I've had real life issues to deal with, and...yeah. _

_Merry Christmas, everyone! I'll try to put the rest of this up later._


End file.
